What if your colleagues know your homosexual lifestyle?

It has always occured in my mind that my homosexual lifestyle will be known by colleagues or boss. What if they knew my homosexual lifestyle and started to behave differently or even shun away from me? I used to have that kind of fear. Especially here in Indonesia where homophobic people are everywhere. At least they look down on us, if they are not homophobics. With the negative stereotypes of gay people, you of course will feel insecure if they know about you. I think it's normal for people like us to feel unsafe or somewhat lonely in the crowd of people not like us.

But however, this kind of feeling must not hold or hinder us from exploring the world. I should had realized this long time ago. But still it scares me to imagine if my kinded heart friends and colleagues know who truly I am. Can't imagine if they start to look away from me when I call. After worrying thought and thinking, I become pathetically depressed. I just can't be myself around them. What the fuck...what's wrong with me.